Lifelong loneliness

Hi @somethingelse

Welcome to the forums.

Thank you for sharing what's been going on for you, it sounds like you've been carrying this for some time. It's understandable to feel this way when you've made efforts to connect with others but are left feeling misunderstood, let down and unseen. We all deserve to feel understood and to feel connected, and it makes sense your hope is worn down when you've had those experiences.

I'm also really sorry to hear about your experiences with psychologists and counsellors. Seeking support isn't an easy process, finding an approach or person that feels like the right fit can take time.

I'm really glad you've reached out here. I imagine there may be other members who can related to what you've shared, as many people come to the forums seeking connection and support. You're welcome here, this is a safe space to share your feelings and experiences. I hope you find this space supportive and feel a sense of connection here.

Wonderingalice1

Hi @somethingelse 

I’m sorry you’ve felt lonely your whole life. That must be an awful experience. It makes sense that you’ve given up trying to meet new people because they are unwilling to return your effort. There’s only so much you can do on your end. A relationship requires two people. It must have been a huge let down that psychologists and counsellors have been unhelpful. Hopefully you can find some sort of connection here. It’s hard to be rejected but you have to keep putting yourself out there until you find your people. Do you have any hobbies/interest that you can use to find like minded people?

I enjoy writing (though it's difficult to do with a low mood) and board games and video games, amongst other things. I've tried several different groups around Perth based on these activities, in the interests of meeting people, but they were the wrong demographic or the structure wasn't conducive for socialising or they didn't make me feel welcome.

I make the mistake of trying to befriend people at work. Time and time again. I’m 40 and I personally have hit a block. Talk poppy syndrome is real wherever I go. Trying to find people who are like minded are difficult.

Even harder when you have no family or the family you do have obviously do not care.

I’ve been looking at support groups for depression.

Just anything to attend really to get a sense of connection again. I’m starting there. They’re hard to search for sometimes. But there’s a couple of zoom meeting ones I might go to.

I’m pivoting my career for a pay cut to another location because it is slightly closer to home and the sooner I am home the sooner I can be with my partner. Who is literally the only thing that keeps me sane.

i crave female friendship and a job that doesn’t feel hustle like. I don’t know what I was thinking when I tried to climb the corporate ladder. Everyone is miserable here…I am more miserable than I have ever been in my life.

Work, the work people, lack of connection, lack of feeling like I belong and my already existing mental health issues just makes me feel at a loss of joy or hope for the future.

its to the point where I want to quit the health department and go to any job that’s much much closer to home. I’m being judged already by going for ‘lesser” jobs in the department but i don’t care. I want to be an ant again, where I’m not second guessing myself because of the workplace bullying. I just want to quit and go live in the forest because working like this is over rated. I sometimes wonder if life wellbeing is considered more important in other countries and to move there.

We understand you here @somethingelse you are not alone. It’s lovely seeing you on the forum, we have some awesome friends here ☀️ I’ll tag a couple 😊. @MissGremlin @heartathome @Captain24 @Cuddlebear 💚A little tip if you put @ and someone’s forum name it will turn blue and it will tag them and they will get a notification that you have posted a message to them 😊

Hi @Sunflowers2908 really hearing you. Connection is vital to us all, and it can be difficult to find 'our people' in today's world, as well as finding a place of work that doesn't revolve around hustle culture. It sounds like you have a drive to make changes in your life that will help you to build community and increase your sense of purpose and satisfaction. Not always an easy road, but a worthy one I think. I wish you luck in this endeavour and hope that you can find what you're looking for :)