That little green thing...get your mind out of the gutter!:)

‘Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering.’

Yoda

What is fear? Well it is mostly an illusion built up in our heads, caused by overreaction to stimuli when we feel overwhelmed - when it comes to mental health anyway.

Since it is an illusion, we could describe it as False Evidence Appearing Real, or perhaps Feeling Everything And Reacting, or maybe just Finding Everything Awfully Reactive…but enough wordplay.

The emotion behind our thoughts is what gives fear its power. Ever wonder why those who are more empathetic, more kind, more compassionate seem to be more susceptible to mental illness? Its probably because we feel things more deeply and we put higher expectations on ourselves, maybe as the ones who need to be strong for others, or because we care more deeply. Many of us overthink, which is another problem that exacerbates fear.

The dark side we find ourselves thrust into seems fathomless when we are overwhelmed, as if we are caught in a prison with walls we cannot see, in a place that we are unfamiliar with. Over time we become frustrated and angry with ourselves, we begin to hate things that we falsely compare ourselves to, which deepens our despair and our perceived situation. We end up suffering unnecessarily as a result.

Unfortunately, there is usually no little green goblin in a smock there to give us sage pearls of wisdom. No, my young Padowan…green goblin, there is not. BUT, we do have our very own lightsaber to cut through the dross and light up the dark at the same time…if we know where to find it.

What is this lightsaber of which you speak, tell me, you must! Its your self-esteem. When we are down, we think less of ourselves because our self-perceived standards are not where we believe they should be. As time goes on, and the frustration builds, we believe in ourselves less and less, and our inner light dims…and the ‘darkness’ appears to be all around us.

But the darkness is an illusion. You control it, but you probably don’t realise it - and that is the ‘power’ depression has over us: we think we are helpless. We’re not. Ever.

At any time, you can take small steps forward and slowly change your world. If you have isolated, you can find simple ways to step out and meet others. The library, the shops, clubs, walking groups, night classes, even digitally, through forums like this. The trick is to take it in bite-sized pieces as you are comfortable.

At any time, you can start exercising again. You start with the simple goal of putting your running shoes on and opening the door. Then you walk a lamp post. The next day, you make it two, then three. As silly as it might sound, it works, because you are making forward progress. Keep it to yourself too - it’s nobody else’s business and you want to avoid the types who might think such small steps are pointless.

At any time, you can begin to be nicer to yourself. Start by feeling genuinely grateful for anything in your life that is good - if you find it difficult, reframe the question with, “Well, what could be good if I looked for it?” Journal regularly - if you don’t do it every day, or forget to, don’t worry - its a record of your thoughts, you will forget sometimes, don’t beat yourself up if you do. Every step forward is never wasted.

Are you smellin’ what I’m sellin’ here? Life does not happen to us in great hoary chunks but in a series of smaller ones. When you look at it like that, it lessens the scariness. Remember too, many people have walked whatever path you find yourself on, and finding a ‘scout’ can be supremely helpful. Forums are an excellent way to do that.

Now, go forth, take action…you must…

Icaruslanded