@Taali, sorry to hear you are feeling this way. I have been there, still get it from time to time, so I might be able to offer you some help here: If you find yourself in the situation where you dread the night, it is normally because the subsconscious has free reign and tends to communicate with us through dreams, many of which we do not remember. Of those we do, some can feel scary, primarily because the brain feeds back things we worry about through our dreams through symbols.
I have kept a dream journal for some time now and I tend to like to lucid dream. It is harder to control your dreams when life is causing large amounts of stress, so we default to the more passive kind. Having a very vivid imagination can make it feel worse!
What you can do is set a small goal to get yourself moving, and move forward in small steps. As ridiculous as it might seem, putting away things in smaller groups if it seems too hard all at once can work well, as with groceries, or putting away laundry. You see, when we are struggling mentally and emotionally, we tend to beat ourselves up because we expect to be able to work to our normal set of standards. This is setting yourself up to fail though, because your standards are subjective and your self-esteem has a lot to do with what those standards are (what you perceive is possible at any given time). My advice would be to take things in very small steps and then get yourself to feel good for passing each small milestone. This will give you forward momentum.
Lastly, we can only control our thoughts at the end of the day. We cannot control how others react with accuracy, nor can we control events. Therefore, focus on what is within your control, don't worry about the rest. Life has a strange way of working out the dross anyway. Be kind and be gentle to yourself, as you would a good friend who needed help....be your own bestie my friend. Take care.
