wrong diagnosis

Hi @youngkisses

I don't suffer either of the disorders which you mention

But BPD has a huge stigma attached. Including in the healthcare system. Having that on your file can sometimes lead to decades of professionals including psychologists and psychiatrists treating you badly or unfairly. It really has a huge stigma

All of the Cluster B disorders do carry unfair stigma

I want to just quickly validate what you're feeling. You're not at all wrong to want answers that 'feel more right'.

The best thing I could say for you is to get multiple opinions if you can. As someone who been through alot of therapists, I find alot of them tend to put cases into the 'too hard basket' and just move on to drugs.

If you feel something is off or wrong with your diagnosis, definitely seek extra support. But remember to be open to the idea that you yourself are not a licenced psychotherapist. If you get to a point where multiple actual doctors (not counsellors - important distinction) are all telling you the same thing, then maybe it's worth considering they might know what they're talking about.

It can be very difficult accepting our own perceived 'faults', but its important to remember you will get what you pay for. Not all treatment is equal. If you're looking for real answers instead of symptom management, it may be worth the investment to seek adequate medical care, even if that means looking into something like private healthcare.

In saying that, not everyone can afford the best treatment. At worst, symptom management can be hugely beneficial too. At least to get you to a point where your life is stable enough to get you into a position to start thinking about higher levels of treatment.

One step at a time. If you need to take baby steps to get yourself under reasonable control, do that first. Something is better than nothing.

I do look forward to updates, please do keep in touch.

thank u sm. thank u for warning me too . my psych who told me i have bipolar isnt looking at the whole picture. its probaly bcs i havent told her everything that i get but now im stuck with bipolar on my file which isnt right bcs my symtopms r not bipolar . unless my symptoms r bipolar 1? they told me to diagnose u only need 1 manic episode but i dont feel i get mania but i do get periods like i said where im happy or feel beautiful that last hours or days. i know the stigma with bpd is alot but rn my problem is im being treated wronf way .

thank u @Mr_Be for this . i only see 1 psych i started seeing her this year and she is a private psych. i might get a different opinion aswell . i cant belive the psych says to me and my mum im too severe aswell its annoying when they say this . i also have a script for antiqychotics. idk if i have bipolar or if my symtopms r bipolar but for 2 months i have been doing what they tell me to do. i take a mood stabilizer and i been on it for 3 weeks . im rlly worried im not getting the right help bcs i dont rlly think its bipolar . and thank u sm for everything and explaining things. i am also looking at dbt bcs i rlly want to do it but 2 pycholigts say im pretty much too hard to do therapy on and it isnt going to happen rn. my psycholgist i see now told me all of my problems r probaly my adhd but i dont think its js adhd .

i feel i have had bpd since ages and everything I read abt it js instantly is me but they have bipolar on the file now and my psycholgist thinks it js adhd too (even tho i do have it) .

but i will keep trying to tell more prople more bcs i dont tell everyone rveyrhting bcs drs just see im diagnsoed with bipolar now and its on my file and my adhd is smt i have had for ages too .

Thanks for sharing @youngkisses.

Just try to keep in mind that maybe they do know some things you don't. Try to keep yourself calm and in a positive state of mind. Take the steps to get accurate answers, but also remember that if licenced professionals keep telling you the same thing, maybe they might be onto something.

The thing with things like bpd, and bipolar and adhd is that they can all be really similar in presentation.

How are you finding the antipsychotics? Do you find your moods to be more stable or anything like that? Or are you feeling less stable after the diagnoses?

One day at a time. Your feelings are very valid and you do deserve proper treatment.

@Mr_Be thank u for understanding me and making me feel heard. i will definitely try and find more professionals. I do know if it comes to that and if it is true i will be ok with that aswell but u know rn i have alot of doubts bcs i have alot of reasons why i think im misdiagnosed. i havent started the new medication yet bcs im worried abt starting it but i havent found my mood stabiliser changing anything yet. my behaviour and my mood and stuff is still the same for me

. oh and i forgot to say and i dont know if i said it before but everyday i get triggered which is what makes my mood change rlly fast and i still get rlly reactive which is annoying bcs i still dont find it helping unfoutanley. this is rlly why i feel its much more like bpd and not bipolar. but your right they do look the same. and thanks for making my feelings valid and im going to take your adivce. im going to talk through it with my dr and my psych next time .and thank u sm for replying to me again. i feel bad writing all this and taking up ur time. but if u see this pls dont feel u have to reply to all this if u dont want to.

Of course I want to @youngkisses 🙂

I understand doubt, that's only natural. I would suggest though, start that medication. Worst case it's not for you, you tell the dr, and they try something else. Best case, maybe it does do its job and things get a little bit easier for you to manage. Either way, its worth at least trying. I know some medications can take a few weeks/even months to start working properly, so just try to keep that in mind.

As for getting triggered, I also get that. Best thing I can say is "until we make the unconscious conscious, it will direct our lives and we will call it fate." That's a quote by a really good psychotherapist named Carl Jung (Yung). What it means is, until we become aware of things like our triggers and fears, they will absolutely control our actions and we won't even realise until much later when we go "oh, that's why that happened".

It might be helpful for you to write down things like your fears and triggers even if you don't show anyone (though it might help to show your psych). Actually being aware of the things that you know will trigger you before you come across them will help your decision making in the moment. "Oh I know this is a trigger for me, I might just avoid (or handle with grace) that one for now".

Once you've written them down, it can be even more helpful to figure out what is and isn't in your control for each one. Say for example there's a person who always gets you triggered for whatever reason. Can you control their thoughts or actions? Can you control the trash that comes out of their mouth? Probably not. Can you control your own thoughts, feelings and behaviours? Can you choose to walk away? Can you choose not to engage? Can you choose to take action in a positive direction? "Hey, this thing that you do can be upsetting sometimes, could you please be mindful? Or I'll have to start maintaining a distance to protect my own peace."

Being aware of the things that trigger you and the parts of them that you have control over can help you decide better how you want to respond to them moment by moment.

Couple things to look up if you're interested:
Carl Jung and his work on the shadow self, archetypes and individuation

The Dichotomy of Control, Stoic thought, Epictetus and Marcus Aurelius

And again, please do feel free to keep it coming. I'm not always available to respond immediately, but you're not in any way a burden. If I'm being honest, coming in here and reading long replies and responding thoughtfully has been helping my own journey. It's a good distraction.

Please do keep it coming, and do write as much or as little as you feel you need to 🙂